Whenever I see the stars in the sky, I can’t help missing my first love. Pitifully, she can’t hear me, but I wish her well in heaven.
I was born in 1970 in Baotou city of the Inner Mongolia Autonomous Region. In 1990, I entered the University of Inner Mongolia. I fell in love with Liu Siyuan, a classmate of mine with long hair and beautiful face during our military training. Thanks to my unswerving efforts, I won her heart. During the four years in university, we walked through every street and road of Hohot (capital of Inner Mongolia) together. We visited the Tomb of Wang Zhaojun, the Small and Big Zhao Temples, and took a ferry on the Yellow River. We left our footprints everywhere. We agreed to get married immediately after graduation and never separate. Siyuan came from the same city as I and her hometown was Xiwan village, Goumen town, Tuyou Qi. Her mother died when she was young, so she was raised by her father. I swore that I would work hard and give her a good life after she married me.
After graduation in 1994, we moved south to Guangzhou for the sake of our love. I worked here to accumulate wealth so as to marry my beautiful fiancé. We worked very hard each day from early morning to late night. Despite the hardships, we felt happy because we were together. Three years passed and marriage was on the cards. We had even planned where we would spend our honeymoon. However, a sudden event broke all our plans and separated us from each other forever.
In 1995, Siyuan’s father fell into an elevator shaft in her hometown, which caused him serious bone fractures and brain damage. On hearing this news, Siyuan was shocked and fainted in my arms.
We spent all our marriage savings on her father’s treatment. However, the intracranial congestion didn’t improve. One day, Siyuan told me that she had found a way to save her father. She learned how to practice Falun Gong from a villager named Wang Chunhua. Wang told her that as long as she practiced Falun Gong, she could transcend death and go to heaven. I didn’t take this as a big thing, thinking that she was just too anxious to cure her father, but I told her to trust medical science. After I had spent all of my leave to visit family, I had to go back to Guangzhou and work. She stayed in her hometown to take care of her father.
Unexpectedly, Siyuan became obsessed with Falun Gong. She practiced all day long, listened to the recording and videos of Li Hongzh and, watched the video “Turning the Falun”, thinking that this would help her father recover. However, her father died in May 1996 after his disease deteriorated. After her father’s funeral, Siyuan told me to go back to Guangzhou and she would stay and adjust herself for a while. I didn’t think too much and came back. Gradually, I found that she called me less and less. Whenever I called her, she seldom answered. I went to find her and tried to get her come back to Guangzhou, but she said that she had to practice Falun Gong and couldn’t leave. I wondered what kind of thing could cause her to refuse me. I tried to understand her and her companions. The more I heard, the more absurd it all seemed. Siyuan was indifferent to what I said, so I had no choice but to go back to Guangzhou. I thought maybe she would snap out of it one day and came to find me.
At the end of 1997, Siyuan called me to go back, saying that she had something for me. I thought she had been convinced by me and was asking me to bring her back to Guangzhou. When I opened the door to her house, I found nobody at home. A letter on the table of living room said, “My father left me because I didn’t practice Falun Gong. Now I will go to heaven and protect you.” I looked for her everywhere and even called the police. On 13th December, a call from the police asked me to claim a body. It turned out that she and Wang Chunhua had jumped from a building in Xiwan village in order to go to heaven. I couldn’t help crying when I saw her pale and lifeless body.
I wish you well.
She didn’t know that without her, my life would never be complete. I miss her very much. I went back to Hohhot, Inner Mongolia. Whenever I walked along the familiar streets, I couldn’t help thinking of the time we spent together. Dear Siyuan, I hope you are safe and sound in heaven.
(Editor in chief: Caihong)