My name is Dong Lanlan and I'm a teacher at a kindergarten in Futian District, Shenzhen. I firstly knew about Falun Gong in May 1998 and was interested in the ideas of "Truthfulness, Compassion and Tolerance", as well as the function of "building health and preventing illness" advocated in Zhuan Falun. With curiosity, I went to the place where practitioners gathered and started to practice Falun Gong.
Chinese government banned Falun Gong in July 1999. I knew that to practice it in public or to take part in any of its activities violated the law and would be punished accordingly; besides, I also had the feeling that the things that Falun Gong propagandized were too mysterious and knew that some of its activities had negative social impact. But still I was reluctant to give up on such appealing ideas of "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Tolerance", of "becoming a better person", and of "building health and being immune to illness". So I made up my mind to practice it at home, to be a "good person" in the society, and not to participate in any activities and events organized by Falun Gong. That is, I decided to embrace all the "good" things of Falun Gong and not to touch its "bad" things; this way, I would be alright in case I practice it at home and no one would know about it. After several months of practice, I felt more assured at the way I was doing it. At that time, my husband fell ill due to tight work schedule and weak health and had to stay at home for rehabilitation. I was concerned to see that he had nothing to do at home, so I decided to find something for him to kill time. One day, I said to him: "Honey, why don't you try Falun Gong at home? I know you don't feel like doing exercises, this is different and you can do it at home. It works for me." My husband was a dependent man and would usually follow my advice. So he started to practice Falun Gong. After a while, I found that he became obsessed with it and was afraid that something might go wrong. So I talked to him seriously about it: "Honey, let's make some rules on it. You must practice it at home and don't go out to take part in any activities." My husband said he would listen to me, as he always did. With PhD degree, he's serious about anything and is quite different from me, for I just did the exercises and would look through those books just occasionally. More importantly, I didn't go deep into the things stated in these books. But that was not the case with him. He often visited Minghui Online and read Zhuan Falun everyday. Just like that, he gradually became obsessed with Falun Gong. I was so concerned that I talked to him several times about it. But every time I did, he would say: "don't worry, it's under control and I won't go out and make any trouble."
In 2001, being abetted by Falun Gong and threatened by the scriptures published on Minghui Online, my husband lost control of himself and went to Tian'anmen Square to "clarify the truth" without letting me know. He was then sentenced to two-year reeducation through labor for disturbing social orders. This made me resentful at the authority. What's wrong with "being a good person" and practicing Falun Gong at home to build health? What's wrong with "going out and telling the truth"? I was not convinced by what happened to my husband.
Two years later, my husband went back home and the two of us practiced Falun Gong at home as usual. It seemed to me that he became more cautious than before and didn't go out so often either. I believed that he would never participate in any of the activities organized by Falun Gong. But one day in April this year, policemen came to our apartment searching for the materials about Falun Gong. They found a large amount of Falun Gong books and promotion materials, together with the website of Minghui Online and articles downloaded from the website and saved in our PC. I was so shocked at seeing these and my husband was once again sentenced to two-year reeducation for taking part in illegal activities organized by Falun Gong. I was also under administrative detention for collecting the books on Falun Gong. Later on, I was sent by the community administration to Shenzhen Law School.
At arriving at the school, I shouted at the top of my lung: "What's wrong to be a good person?" I felt that I was wronged and became angry. My tutor talked to me patiently, managing to comfort and reason with me, and gradually calm me down. Since I was there, I might as well stay and make the best of it, I thought to myself; so I decided to wait and see instead of arguing with them. I thought: so I'll see if you can really convince me. In more than one month, the teachers analyzed for me "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Tolerance" from different perspectives of traditional Chinese moralities, culture, religions, materialism and natural sciences, and I gradually saw the real facts and realized the truth behind "Truthfulness, Compassion, and Tolerance" advocated by Falun Gong and the trap of "building health and staying immune to illness".
I started to practice Falun Gong with the confidence that I could manage to get away with the good things of it and that's why I encouraged my husband to practice it in the first place. But what happened later was not what I wanted. The heretical ideas of Li Hongzhi brought harms not only to me but more so to my husband. We wanted to be benefited from Falun Gong instead of getting involved into it and we had rules and promises; but the fact is that my husband participated in the activities organized by Falun Gong in secret and was sentenced to reeducation through labor twice. While I collected and kept the books and materials on Falun Gong at home, getting closer and closer to the cult, becoming increasingly discontent with the banning of Falun Gong by the government, and at last choosing to take the side of Falun Gong. Cruel facts teach me a good lesson and wake me up. I want to tell those kind people still being obsessed with Falun Gong: if you don't make a clean break with Falun Gong, you'll be under the control of Li Hongzhi and Falun Gong sooner or later and your mind will be filled with the heretical ideas of Falun Gong before you lose the independent thinking capacity. My husband and I are typical examples. So when other practitioners claim that they have mysterious experience, I know exactly what happened. Falun Gong plagiarizes the theories of traditional Chinese qigong and cheats on practitioners. When you practice any kind of qigong, the master with conscience will tell you that what you hear and feel during practicing are illusionary and don't take them too seriously. But Falun Gong has done just the opposite for Li Hongzhi encourages the practitioners to take real all the illusions they see and feel. Believing in the heretical ideas advocated by Li Hongzhi, practitioners will think they really get mysterious experience by practicing and thus have trust in the existence of other worlds. This is also one of the main reasons why most practitioners chose not to believe in the government after Falun Gong was banned and why there were so many practitioners committing suicide or self-mutilation, burning themselves, killing others, or suffering mental problems. The root of all these is the fact that Li Hongzhi uses these heretical ideas to put practitioners under strict mental control.
I want to tell those still practicing Falun Gong: if you really want to stay healthy, be sure to observe scientific rules, to seek professional medical care after falling ill, don't believe in the theories of Falun Gong on building health with merely practicing. When I attended the gatherings, the most frequently discussed topic among practitioners was how bad their health used to be and how they managed to improve it after practicing Falun Gong. Most practitioners believe in the miraculous effect of Falun Gong in helping people to stay healthy and be immune from illness. That's also one of the reasons why I encouraged my husband to practice it back then. For years, we were superstitious about Falun Gong and took it as a panacea. Although we have medical insurance provided by Shenzhen Municipal Government, yet we never saw doctor and the only thing we would do when we fell ill was to practice some more. But several years later, the health of my husband hadn't been improved at all; on the contrary, his health had deteriorated. In fact, my husband suffered chronic diseases as a result of high work pressure, tight schedule, and low immunity. His illness would have been nothing if he could do more exercises, manage to keep a good living habit, do regular physical check, and seek medical care in time. But out of good wishes and due to the obsession, we believed that the reason why we kept on practicing Falun Gong but still couldn't improve our health was because our belief in Falun Gong was not strong enough and our practice was not good enough. Sister Gao in her fifties used to be one of my fellow practitioners and she had suffered diabetes since her thirties. After practicing Falun Gong, she had this feeling that she was getting well. Then one day in late 2004, she suddenly lost her sight, which was obviously a complication caused by diabetes. But she didn't think so; instead, she believed that this was a test on her. Her family tried to get her to the hospital, but she refused and her conditions became increasingly worse due to the delay of medical care. When her family finally got her into the hospital by force several months later, the diseases had developed into advanced stage and she was in critical condition suffering a serious of complications including blindness, heart and kidney failure, and high blood pressure. The doctors worked hard and finally managed to save her life. This is also why I have regret it so much and blamed myself for a long time; if I got the truth about Falun Gong earlier, I would never let my husband practice it and he would not be sent to the labor camp. I have caused great harms to my own family and if I could have seen the real picture of Falun Gong, I would persuade Sister Gao to go to hospital and she wouldn't end up with current miserable situation.
After the study, I saw clearly the nature of Falun Gong as a cult and finally had a clean break away from it so to be a person observing the law and being useful to the society. I sincerely hope that other practitioners who see only the superficial aspects of Falun Gong and still practice it just like me before to calm down and to take time to think about it, to know more about Falun Gong, to wake up and to get away from its control, to stop doing things ruining yourselves and others, right now.
(Kaiwind.com, December 1, 2008)
