'Thank-you letter' to Li Hongzhi from one employee of Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital

Dear Master Li Hongzhi,
 
Thank you so much for making our Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital really famous now.
 
From March 2006 to 2007, the obscure Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital has been cited by most major search engines for millions of times, becoming far more well-known than some large international companies. Even if we pay huge for advertising, the effect can not be compared with your free propaganda. As a worker in the so called "concentration camp", I’d like to extend my most sincere respect for your internationalist spirit of "absolute selflessness and utter devotion to others".
 
You are a true master of rumor spreading, slandering and sensationalization. I gathered that you spared no efforts to make our hospital famous, cooking out stories such as "concentration camps", "cremator" and "organ-harvesting", sensationalizing them by investigations, photos, letters, parades, protests and words from former reporters and former employees. People say that Northeast people are all living Lei Feng, and you sure are the living example!
 
Even our boiler room has attached worldwide attention: people from United States Consulate paid visit to it several times; Japanese journalists, Canadian journalists and Hong Kong compatriots came and took photos and videos. I suggest that the United Nation should grade our great boiler room as world rumor cultural heritage, and we can sell tickets and donate the money to you for encouragement.
 
However, there are still some suggestions for Master Li Hongzhi. Firstly, defaming need dedication. After you held the world’s press conference in April 2006, it seemed that you are discouraged and stopped making up new stories for Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital, and the news about us on The Epoch Times gradually decreased! Come on, let the rumors come more violently; it shall begin well and end well. Secondly, making up rumors needs serious morale. You need to mix the spurious with the genuine! Your saying of "walls covered, iron walls, few people" are so fake, regardless of the truth that our hospital is surrounded with dwellings, heavy traffic roads and crowded people. It will make the visitors get lost; they may think that the place they visit is not the Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital. Thirdly, an ignorant and dauntless spirit is needed for rumor spreading. Armed with sleight-of-hand tricks and a set of "theories", you are at a higher level of hierarchy and not a human being any more, but you should at least have some basic medical knowledge and  should not have said that "cerebral surgery doctors harvest corneas"; furthermore, you introduced the so called Annie as the ex-wife of a doctor in the Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital this time, but a statistician or a nurse the other time. I’m wondering that isn’t she the Monkey King who is able to change her identity?
 
In conclusion, as one employee of the world-renowned Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital, it’s all thanks to you that I’ve been raised to the "next level of hierarchy" and about to make a fortune out of it! If I have a chance, I will go to the moon and build a hospital with a boiler room there. After Goddess "Chang'e" and the Japanese "Moon Goddess" find this miracle, I believe it can apply for the universal rumor cultural heritage and sell tickets for visiting!
 
Thank you again, Master Li. Hope you can help us to realize this dream!
 
Zhang Xu, Sujiatun Thrombus Hospital
 
April 24, 2008