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The college entrance examination of this year has come to an end. Looking at smiling faces of neighbors’ children which are full of yearning and longing for a bright future, I am really happy for them while feeling a pain in my heart for my daughter. If I hadn’t been so obsessed with the “Almighty God” cult, my daughter would’ve been at university now with a promising future. I deeply regret it whenever I think of my previous addiction to “Almighty God”.
My name is Zhang Yuhua (a pseudonym). And I am 45 years old. I come from Gaozhuang Town, Yishui County, Shandong Province. I once had a happy family of three. My husband and I opened a pancake shop in the county soon after our marriage. Although we lived a busy life back then, we were full of hope for our future.
After my daughter was born in 2003, I asked my mother-in-law to come to the county so as to help me with babysitting the child. Since I always had a short temper and I couldn’t stand my mother-in-law’s attitude about personal hygiene, I was upset frequently after she came to live with us. Therefore, I wasn’t on good terms with my mother-in-law and there were constant trivial disagreements between us. But I had to suck it up, otherwise, there would be no helper for me to take care of my daughter, such situation made my life quite uncomfortable. Later, Aunt Wang who was a regular customer of our pancake shop invited me to believe in “God”, saying that there would be no more worries if I followed God’s guidance. I thought I might as well give it a try to see whether it could really make me less agitated. I discussed my thought with my husband. At that time, both my husband and I had no idea that the “Almighty God” organization was an evil cult, we both thought it wouldn’t hurt to believe in Jesus and get spiritual relief there. So, with my husband’s consent, I had spare time to believe in “God” together with Aunt Wang.
At first, Aunt Wang took me to the place of a sister surnamed Yang. Later, Aunt Wang said that because my pancake shop as a public place was more convenient for “Communion” and parties, so my home became the gathering venue. In the meantime, Aunt Wang suggested that I should have my mother-in-law join the church as well. I thought perhaps it was a good idea, we might have a good relationship after we were both followers of “God”. After all, my mother-in-law was a kind-hearted person in spite of her unpleasant words and bad hygienic habit. After hearing that believing in “God” would bring blessings and expel ill fortune for the whole family, my mother-in-law agreed without any hesitation. In this way, all my family members became “Almighty God” followers except for our 5-year-old daughter who was too young to learn how to be a follower.
With the increase of our parties for “eating and drinking God’s words”, the sister in charge of “educating” us told me that we should “do our part” for “God” and that the more we do, the more blessing we would get from “God”. At that time, my family savings was just over 60,000 Yuan which was hard-earned by my husband and me through selling pancakes from morning to night every day. So, I was quite hesitated to offer it as a “tribute”. After sharing my thought with Aunt Wang, she told me that “God” would not force me do anything, but “God” had the message that the more tribute one offers, the more devout one must’ve been. “Tribute” was a symbol of being a true follower. On the one hand I considered myself a devout follower, but on the other, I was afraid that my husband might not agree with my decision. Therefore, I only secretly took out 20,000 Yuan out of our savings as the “tribute” and handed it to a local “Almighty God” leader surnamed Liu (we called him “Brother Liu”).
After offering the “tribute” of 20,000 Yuan, I was appointed as the “Gospel Deaconess” by the local “Almighty God” organization. According to requirements of the “Almighty God” cult, I had to “spread the Gospel” to other towns. It happened in Year 2011, when my daughter was just in Grade two at the time. Although she had her granny to take care of her at home, I still couldn’t feel easy about her without me. Additionally, I worried that perhaps my husband couldn’t manage the pancake shop all by himself. When I was in two minds about following the requirement of the “Almighty God” organization, words in the cult book Singing New Songs with Lambs popped into my mind, such as “Give up your attachment for personal effects”, “Give up your emotions for your husband and children”, “Don’t give up the truth for the sake of family harmony”, etc. At last, I made up my mind and ran away from home along with all the family savings to carry out the task of “spreading the Gospel” outside my hometown.
I transferred several times before arriving at a sister’s place in Liaocheng City. As per the instruction from the cult organization, I changed my phone number and cut off contact with my family completely. In Liaocheng City, I once doubted whether I made a mistake after learning that we as “Almighty God” followers should carry out actions furtively. At last, I convinced myself that there was nothing wrong to ask people believe in Jesus and do good deeds. And I believed the reason why we had to keep a low profile was that some people and our government didn’t truly understand “God”.
I hid behind a false identity in accordance with requirement from the cult organization. At first, I lived in a sister’s place. Later, I helped to work in a noodle restaurant where the boss provided accommodation for me in the shop. I worked there for over 3 years before being relocated to Anhui Province. During my stay in Anhui Province, I withdrew all the money from my bank account which was more than 40,000 Yuan and offered it as a “tribute” to the “Almighty God” organization after I heard the news that many fellow brothers and sisters had no source of income while spreading the Gospel outside. I wanted to help them, and I wanted to get more blessings from “God” as well.
During that time, I missed my family a lot, especially my daughter. I remembered her academic performance was always good when I left. For that, I was very grateful to “God” for blessing my daughter. But I knew nothing about her grades or well-beings anymore after leaving home. To tell the truth, I missed her very much. Although I was convinced that she would be all right by the grace of “God”, I felt quite lonesome without seeing her.
In 2020, I was reported to police by local people for participating the “Almighty God” cult activities. Then I was sent back to my hometown by police. Only then did I know that my husband fell ill because he was worried about me after I lost contact with the whole family. Consequently, the pancake shop was also closed. As to my daughter who once had high academic achievement, she dropped out of school to take care of her ill father. Seeing all these dramatic changes to my family, I couldn’t help crying out. I believed in “Almighty God” with true devotion and tried my best to “do my part” for “Almighty God”. But why wasn’t my family blessed by God?
With the careful and patient help of social volunteers, I finally realized that I was deceived. When I wanted to retrieve my “tributes” of more than 60,000 Yuan, I came to know that it was impossible to get it back because all my “leaders” had absconded with my money, and all their names were false ones.
The lost money could be earned back. But it was very hard for my child to continue her study after dropping out of school for over two years. So, she chose to work. Although my husband has recovered quite well and the family is filled with warmth again, just like old days, I feel so sorry for the mistake I have made. Especially, when seeing girls of my daughter’s age in full preparation to go to college, I hate the “Almighty God” for cutting off my daughter’s access to universities.
