My name is Zhang Fan, and I’m a woman. I was born in January 1960 and graduated from a high school. I was an employee of a wood products enterprise in Linjiang, Jilin Province. In 2006, I moved to Baishan city, but I didn’t inform the local police department of my settling down in order to prevent the government from knowing my whereabouts. I once had a warm family, and my husband and I both worked in local enterprises. But everything changed after we were obsessed with Falun Gong. It all went back to the year 1998.
One day in February 1998, my husband brought a Falun Gong book with him after he got back home from work, saying that by studying the book our bodies would be so fit and healthy that we no longer needed to take any medicine or injection, apart from which we could also went to heaven made of gold. Therefore, we got up early to practice Falun Gong every day, and became addicted to it. Ever since then, we started to think of our children as burdens so we left them with our parents, and we also viewed our jobs as burdens so I got a sick note from hospital and took a long sick leave with it. During that time, my husband and I only slept few hours per day and spent most of the day on studying the Falun Gong book really hard. On a daily basis, we took that book as criterion to guide us on what to think, what to say and what to do in nearly every aspect of our lives, because we were afraid if we did something wrong, then we would increase our bad karmas and incur more difficulties to stop us from getting into higher levels.
In July 1999, the news that the state banned Falun Gong made me feel obligated to step forward bravely to safeguard and promote Falun Gong as an advanced practitioner. Therefore, one day in January 2001, we were sent back to our native town and asked to take sessions in a local psychological correction center because of our violation of laws by taking part in illegal demonstrations. Due to my long absence from work, the enterprise that I worked in terminated the labor contract with me in accordance with its internal regulations.
I once even had a terrible quarrel with my father in a bus because my father strongly disapproved of me cultivating Falun Gong, which made me think he was a selfish, stubborn, and unreasonable old fogey. All my relatives and neighbors regarded us as psychos and stayed away from us after they saw us behave strangely and talk nonsenses all the time.
Although my husband was in poor health before practicing Falun Gong, diseases including diabetes only had a little influence on the quality of his life as he paid attention to his diet, kept taking medicines, and went to hospital for routine medical examinations. However, after he started to practice Falun Gong, he ditched all his medicines because of his belief in the miraculous Dafa, and we all showed contempt to hospitals because we were firmly convinced that diligently studying the great Dafa and practicing Falun Gong could certainly bring about good results.
One night in September 2010, my husband who replaced regular medication with Falun Gong cultivation and karma elimination felt a sharp pain in his heart. What I did right away was to stand up with my palms in vertical position to “Send Forth Righteous Thoughts”, murmuring, ‘Master Li, please save my husband! Master Li, please save my husband!’ After a short while, his pain gradually subsided, and I kept thanking Li Hongzhi because I thought the recovery of my husband should be credited to the protection of Master Li’s Dharma body and his compassion towards practitioners.
When our relatives knew about this incident, they all advised us to go to hospital for further examinations. But my husband and I all regarded it as a test from master Li for us. We believed that the worse the disease was, the closer we were from obtaining a true fruition, which was the exact reason why we insisted on not going to hospital. As my husband became weaker and weaker, our children were more and more anxious and worried, so they painstakingly tried to persuade my husband to taking medicines. Although we promised them in word, we didn’t do what they asked, what we actually did was to throw those pills away behind their back when they were not at home.
In March 2011, my husband’s condition was getting worse and worse and had more and more difficulties in breathing. Adhering to the belief of “eliminating karma”, he kept refusing to take medicines or go to hospital, and he believed what was happening to him was just another test for him from “Master Li”. By no means would he disobey the requirements of Dafa so that the goal of “ascending to heaven” would possibly be achieved.
Now my husband is gone, but his moan of pain lingers in my ears. Looking back on all those absurd efforts we made in these years, my heart is bleeding in regret. In over ten years, I ruined my career, abandoned my family, and wasted all our savings for nothing regardless of our parents and children. With helps and guidance of social volunteers, and painful lessons I learned in real life, I finally became disillusioned with Falun Gong. It is now crystal clear to me that Falun Gong is utterly an evil cult and Li Hongzhi, the founder of Falun Gong, is a big liar! Falun Gong drove me fanatical about cult, made my family broken, caused the death of my beloved husband, and left me with nothing but endless pains! All in all, Falun Gong has totally ruined my life!
